Naw, that doesn’t happen, does it?  Oh yeah.  It does.  That’s one (among many) reasons you have a facilitator in the room to ensure the group stays focused and on track.  One of the best ways to gracefully intervene to keep the dogs and horses at bay is to use the humble flipchart.

A simple, yet elegant tool, it allows you to capture the comment the first time it comes up, and then you can refer to it along the way.

A few years ago, a fellow IAF colleague of mine, Ned Ruete, came up with a list of the top ten things to do with a flipchart:

• Write it down and hang it on the wall.
• Work on one issue at a time.  Let the group choose and work the issue.
  Write it down and hang it on the wall.
• Agree on how to work on that issue.  Tap the group wisdom for how to work before offering your own process.  Write it down and hang it on the wall.
• When someone offers an idea, write it down and hang it on the wall.
  If they offer it repeatedly, point to where it is, written down and hanging on the wall.
• If someone attacks a person for a “dumb” idea, ask them where the idea is written down and hanging on a wall.  Move to it.  Move the discussion to the idea, away fro the person who offered it.  If additions, qualifications, clarifications, or pros and cons are offered, write it down and hang it on the wall.
• When the group is discussing, voting on, or coming to consensus around a solution, write it down and hang it on the wall.
• When the group moves away from the agreed-to issue, go to where you wrote it down and hung it on the wall, call their attention to it, and give them the choice to change the issue, go back to the one they agreed to, show how this one affects the one they agreed to, or put a time limit on the digression.  Whatever they decide, write it down and hang it on the wall.
• When the group moves away from the agreed-to process, go to where you wrote it down and hung it on the wall, call their attention to it, and give them the choice to change the process, go back to the one they agreed to, show how this one affects the one they agreed to, or put a time limit on the digression.  Whatever they decide, write it down and hang it on the wall.
• When someone says, “We ought to _____,” find out who will.  Then write it down and hang it on the wall.
• Before breaking up, find out when the group will get back together.  Write it down and hang it on the wall.

It’s been 20 years since I started my business facilitating teams and training others to do what I do.  Back then, no one even knew how to spell “facilitator”, no less what a facilitator did!

As they say, we’ve come a long way, baby.  The root word, “facil” is latin for “make things easier”.  True enough, “Facilitator” is used all the time to describe anyone who “makes things easier”.

In the world of teams and meetings, a facilitator guides the process – helping the team get from Point A to Point B – the desired outcome.

Now, we all know that the shortest distance between two points is….a straight line.  But do teams march straight to the desired outcome?   I think not!  So a facilitator saves you time, money, and grief by providing process expertise, keeping the group on task, and fulfilling these main functions:

Clarify the charter.  The facilitator gets together with the sponsor and team leader to make sure they all understand the team’s goal(s) and expectations, the composition of the team, timeframes, deliverables, capabilities, and constraints.
Partner with the team leader.  Before the team ever meets, the facilitator gets together with the team leader and agrees on the basic strategies to move the team forward.  They will agree on how to prepare for and critique that meeting – or the series of meetings.  The facilitator then develops an initial agenda for the team to follow.
Guide the process.  As the process expert, you provide structure and process tools to help the team achieve its goal.  At the beginning of each meeting, ensure the team agrees to the agenda and time limits.  Keep the meeting on the topic and moving along.
Ensure a safe environment.  The facilitator thinks through the barriers to effective participation and how to ensure the environment is conducive to collaboration.
Manage participation.  The facilitator opens discussions and invites participation by all.  She tactfully prevents anyone from being overlooked or dominating the discussion.  She also summarizes and closes the discussions.
Intervene when necessary.  When the team gets off track or if the discussion fragments into multiple conversations, the facilitator will step in to bring the team back on topic.
Manage conflict constructively. All teams have some degree of “conflict” where each person has a different point of view.  Otherwise, why would you call a team together?  A facilitator helps the team hear and discuss these differing opinions to ensure they generate “light” around the issue and not “heat”.
Check decisions.  Teams make small decisions throughout the meeting.  When the facilitator senses that a decision has been made, he will check for understanding and agreement.  He then makes sure the team understands the next steps and who will do them.
Clarify next steps.  Every team meeting should end with specific tasks assigned to specific team members.  Otherwise, you have just had a great conversation, but no results!  The facilitator makes sure everyone understands who is responsible for what and by when.
Develop the team.  A facilitator’s secondary goal is to enable the team to function effectively over the long term – that all the team members have good facilitative and team skills.  This means that the facilitator is constantly training, coaching and developing the team leader and team members along the way.
Documents the discussion.  Most teams go through a predictable pattern of discussion: generation of ideas, organization/prioritization of those ideas to be able to select a quality decision to take action.  An external facilitator may document that discussion within a few days so the team can move quickly on their commitments.

When you have a facilitator performing these functions, the team stays much more focused on the desired outcomes, you take less time because the team doesn’t stray off topic, and you have greater commitment to the final decision.

Find out more about how we help you achieve your meeting objectives.

My experience of the new movie, Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy is exactly that.  Set during the height of the Cold War, the former head of British Intelligence (simply named as “Control”) believed one of his direct reports was in fact a Russian agent – a mole – and a failed operation in Hungary was an attempt to identify which of them it was. Smiley (Gary Oldman), who also reported to Control had been forced into retirement after the debacle, but is asked by a senior government official to investigate the possibility of a double agent in the highest ranks of British Intelligence.

So was there a mole on the team?

SPOILER ALERT:  Yes, there was one.  I won’t tell you whom, but suffice it to say the signs were all there.  It was up to Smiley (and the audience) to solve the riddle.

So what does this have to do with teams?  Lots.  You can tell who is playing full out and who is not.  Just look at the signs.  Connect the dots.  And then check to see if your perceptions are reality.  Unlike the Cold War, it’s not bloody likely you have a mole in your team – but you may have some passive or aggressive behaviors that are keeping the team from performing at its fullest potential.   Unfortunately, you can’t just ignore these signs.  Like Smiley, you will have to deal with it, and do it early, before it escalates into a failed operation.

I intend to schedule a webinar in March, June, September, and August of this year.  As far as topics go, I could talk for days about teamwork, but we’re only looking at a 45 minute webinar!

So here are some titles/topics I was thinking about, and would like to have your opinion as to what top four webinars you would not only be interested in attending, but would actually sign up!  2012 will be complementary, as I’ll be getting the kinks out of the system.  I’ve done a few, but I wouldn’t exactly call myself an amazing webinar presenter – yet.

TeamSpeak: Words to Use or Lose to Inspire Better Teamwork

Boring to Bravo: 10 Tips to Make Your Presentations Extraordinary!

Beyond Consensus: 3 Little Known Secrets to Achieving Solid Agreements Among Your Team Mates

A Team Leader’s Toolkit for Handing Difficult People

The Do’s & Don’ts of Teamwork & Collaboration: 5 Critical Skills to Take Your Team to the Next Level

Are you a Light Bulb or a Flame Thrower?  How to Manage the Inevitable Conflicts in Teams

Team Player or Spectator?  3 Critical Insights to Building a High Performance Team

Go Beyond the Ordinary: 5 Critical Decisions Every Team Leader Must Make

Any other topics/titles you have in mind?

Thanks for voting now on your top topics and helping me crowdsource the best titles/topics for 2012!  You have until Sunday, January 15th to let me know.  Thanks a bazillion!

From www.CartoonStock.com

My client was complaining about his teammate’s hidden agenda.  Curious, I asked him to tell me about it – which he did, and in some detail.

I had to laugh.  This isn’t a case of the “hidden agenda.”  This agenda was well-known and in the open.  Instead, it was a case of a “misaligned” agenda.  My client’s agenda and his teammate’s agenda didn’t match up.  To make matters more complex, there are actually four levels of potential misalignment:  1) Between team members; 2) Between a team member and the team’s stated objective; 3) Between a team member and the organization’s stated objectives; and 4) Between the team’s objectives and the organization’s stated objectives.

Most people are pretty transparent. When you take the time to notice their behaviors and what they are saying, that hidden agenda becomes not so hidden.

You also need to take the time to verify that your perceptions are true.  As human beings, we have a great time making stuff up, reading between the lines and dreaming up all kinds of plots and daring-do that are simply by-products of an over-active imagination.  In my experience, people are much more straightforward about their desires.

There is; however, a small, miniscule percentage of the population who is much more machiavellian.  These folks have an ulterior motive – and you don’t know what it is. But you do know they have an agenda – and it is hidden from you.

Regardless of the type of agenda, it is best to get the agendas out in the open, on the table, and constructively discuss them as a group.  The goal is to bring all the agendas (individual, team, organizational) in alignment.  You may even surprise yourself and shift your own personal agenda!

I am reading the Game of Thrones by George R.R. Martin (No, I haven’t seen the HBO series- I like to read the books first!), and one of the characters, Jon Snow, is afflicted with the tall poppy syndrome when he first gets to the Wall.   Because he has had more training than the other boys, Jon takes great pride in defeating all the other boys during the training and sparring sessions. What happens?  The humiliated and frustrated boys attack him one night until one of the adults intervenes.  The armorer, Donal Noye, has a heart-to-heart talk about how Jon’s behaviors are being seen by the rest of the boys.  ”Suddenly, [Jon] felt ashamed and guilty.  ’I never….I didn’t think….’ [said Jon].   ‘Best you start thinking,’ Noye warned him.  ”That, or sleep with a dagger by your bed.  Now go.’”

Here’s my random thought generator:  Teams NEED people with diverse talents and skills.  You just can’t show them too quickly.  Every team goes through a typical pattern of development – (Tuckman’s forming, storming, norming, and performing) – and tall poppies don’t do well during the forming phase when teams are initially come together.

While it is helpful to share your abilities with your team mates, there is a fine line between sharing and shining.  Only when you have moved into the norming phase where team members are more comfortable with each other will they be able to agree on how to “share” the limelight.  At different times, each team member can be a tall poppy!

I have never liked the notion “there is no ‘I’ in “team.”  Teams come together first as individuals, and then form into a team to accomplish a common objective.  As an individual, you must accept responsibility for your attitude and skills that contribute to the team’s work.

Christopher M. Avery, in his book Teamwork is an Individual Skill, asserts that individuals have the power to contribute to the team’s success.  Rather than whine and moan about your fate, consider the possibility that you have a choice to make or break a collaborative relationship with each person on the team.

Make a Difference.  Individuals can make a huge difference in the dynamics of a team.  Recognize that you have the power to speak up and be heard, challenge assumptions and be proactive in managing the relationship.  That means you work closely with your teammates; you make every effort to support each other; you keep each other informed and work together to solve problems; you offer help without being asked; and most importantly, you follow through on your commitments.

Keep Your Promises.  To build your personal power, Avery contends you “make only agreements — no matter how small — that you fully intend to keep.  Then consistently improve your ability to do that.  When you fail to honor an agreement, clear it up with the other person at the first opportunity by acknowledging that you didn’t keep the agreement, apologizing for not coming through as promised, asking how you can make amends, and recommitting to the relationship.”

Be Intolerant.  When others do not follow through on their commitments, don’t avoid the situation.  Bring it to the group’s attention (in a very kind and gracious way).  But don’t sweep it under the table.  It is your responsibility to call “foul” at the earliest sign that agreements aren’t being honored.  Avery suggests that the “secret to successful confrontation is to confront without inviting escalation or shaming the recipients.  That leaves them room to respond.”

No Whining.  Complaining about your teammates behind their backs is one of the deadliest sins to teamwork.  When you have an issue with a fellow teammate, bring it up to the person.  If you ignore it, the situation will never resolve itself; it will only get worse.  When you find yourself talking about another teammate who is not present, simply stop!  Go find that person and have a meaningful conversation about the circumstances and why you feel the way you do.

Examine the Upset.  We all get frustrated in our teams; upset about something or another.  When you feel upset with someone, explore your feelings objectively to discover exactly what it is and where it comes from.  I refer to this as an “out of body experience.”  Look at the situation from all points of view and all possibilities.  Then, take a look in the mirror – the source of your frustration probably starts with you!  You might be mad, upset, angry, etc. but you’re the one who is choosing to be mad.  You are giving the other person the power to affect you – and chances are, you are mad about it because you see the same attribute in yourself. (Yikes, I may not like what I see in that mirror!)  Once you have fully examined why you’re upset, only then can you release it and let it go.

Learn From Each Upset.  “The key is not to avoid, eliminate, or cover up mistakes and upsets, but to learn, correct, and improve each time,” asserts Avery.  “High performers recognize that an upset is an opportunity to learn.  Determine how you can change your behavior to strengthen the team.”

Question:  How can you make your team better instead of complaining?

To book Kristin to speak or view her products go to www.ExtraordinaryTeam.com

In a weird and twisted way, I liken this situation to my aversion to peas.  Simply put, I don’t like peas at all.  Never have and never will.  Can’t tell you why, either.  Others might like peas, but for whatever reason, I just don’t. 

So let’s follow the analogy . . . do you have people on your team you just don’t like?  Others might like them, but you just don’t?  And the reason doesn’t really matter, now, does it?

When it comes to dealing with peas (or people you don’t care for), you have five basic options:

Avoidance.  You can opt to stay away from them completely.  In fact, you may spend lots of time and energy figuring out how to avoid those awful peas.  I have even seen people elevate their hatred of peas into their favorite pastime!  Are you actively avoiding someone on your team?  Lamenting their very existence?

Passive Resistance.  You pick those nasty peas out of the dish and put them aside . . . maybe for the dog to eat later.  Are you passively avoiding someone on the team?  You may acknowledge their existence, but refuse to engage.

Camouflage.  I used to hide peas in my milk so my mother would think I ate them.  Inevitably, I was always caught.  She always knew when I was faking it.  Are you outwardly playing good team, but inwardly resenting the person?  Some would call this being “two-faced” or mildly schizophrenic.

Limited Doses.  As I got older and more mature, I learned to tolerate a few peas.  As an adult, I still don’t care for peas, but if they are mixed in a dish that I like, I can eat them without a fuss.  Can you demonstrate your maturity and put your differences aside?

Do a Forrest Gump.  Can you not only get along, but also acknowledge and accept your teammate’s differences?  Just like “peas and carrots,” bring together people into combinations that work to enhance the team’s objectives.  Take a fresh look at your team members’ skills, talents, and abilities.  Notice the different flavors and diverse perspectives they bring to table. 

Keep in mind; you have a choice.  It’s the incompatibility that creates a team’s uniqueness.  If we thought the same as you, acted the same and had the same beliefs, we wouldn’t need a team, would we?

Question:  How do you deal with team members who you just don’t like?  Do you put your team’s best interest first?

To book Kristin to speak or view her products go to www.ExtraordinaryTeam.com

When conducting negotiations using a team approach, he suggests the following techniques to make sure your team uses one voice:

Follow Your Leader.  Lead negotiators carry the negotiations.  The negotiation is not a democracy, so whomever is assigned that position should make it clear that he or she is responsible for providing the “one voice” to the other party in full session.

Be Prepared.  Lead negotiators use well-prepared, rehearsed opening comments that help establish the tone of the meeting.  All team members know what, if anything, they are allowed to say in full session.

Introductions, Anyone?  The team leader should start off by introducing the negotiation team members.  Remember, you’re building rapport, so take a comfortable amount of time to kick the meeting off appropriately.  Let people on both sides of the negotiation get to know each other and start building a level of trust with each other.

Listen ‘til It Hurts.  Everyone should be listening and observing everything when not speaking.  Be prepared to share your observations with the negotiation team when in caucus.

Take a Time Out.  If there is something that needs to be discussed privately, any team member can call a “caucus” to discuss the issue in a separate room.  Caucus frequently; it’s a sign of preparedness, strength, confidence, and teamwork.  After all, two (or more) heads are better than one!

Routinely Recap.  Continually summarize which points have been agreed upon, what next steps need to be taken, and what deadlines need to be met.

Follow Up.  Every negotiation should conclude with a letter, fax, or email summary of the agreements, next steps, and deadlines.

Question:  Do you need to hone your negotiation skills?

To book Kristin to speak or view her products go to www.ExtraordinaryTeam.com

When team members complain to us, we usually assume they want our help and our suggestions.  We think we know what they really want and readily provide our thoughtful comments and feedback.  Unfortunately, we often incorrectly diagnose the complaint by treating the symptoms and not the root causes.  Rarely is the moaning and groaning about the real issue that needs to be dealt with!  For example, someone who complains about traffic may really want flexible work hours; someone who complains about their bills may want a pay raise or bonus.  We usually fail as mind readers and the problem will go unresolved.

Gaffney suggests a few simple techniques to lift them out of their rut of complaint:

Intently Listen.  Gaffney believes that the main reason why complaining continues is that your teammate doesn’t feel like he is being heard.  When someone complains, listen not only with your ears, but with your eyes and heart.  Take in the nonverbals, the tone, pace, and feeling of what the other person is saying.  Then reflect the words and the emotions by saying something like, “I understand you are upset/stressed/annoyed at….”  By paraphrasing their thoughts and emotions, the complainer will feel heard.

No Buts.  Avoid saying something like, “I understand you are upset BUT….”  The “but” makes someone feel invalidated and is the same as saying, “Don’t get upset” or “Don’t worry.”  When we tell others “not to feel” a certain way, we only make them more emotional.  However, the more we acknowledge the other person’s emotions, the more likely they will feel they have been heard and the emotions will be diffused and dissipate.

Facilitate Solutions.  Change the conversation from problem-finding to solution-searching.  Ask her questions such as, “What do you think we should do about it?” or “What would you like done” or “How can we resolve this?”  By asking and finding out what people really want, we can quickly eliminate the complaining and move to a much more positive conversation.

No Excuses.  When people say “I don’t know,” Gaffney says “it is usually code language for ‘I am afraid to ask you.’  It is important to be patient.  This helps to set the tone and will condition the other person to realize that you are committed to helping them.”

Look for a Win-Win.  Brainstorm ideas to come up with a solution that resolves the complaint and is agreeable to all team members. 

Question:  How do you handle complainers on your team?

To book Kristin to speak or view her products go to www.ExtraordinaryTeam.com